I just wrote a blog about my anger towards the public’s treatment of the police and the way the city is handling it. But all it did was make me angrier. It did not feel cathartic or give me any peace.
So I deleted it.
I can’t promise an angry blog won’t show its face in the coming new year. But for now, I will stick with this: Please respect your first responders. They deserve so much more credit than they are given. They are our superheroes. The police, fire department, dispatchers, and medics are phenomenal people who do a lot more than the general public will EVER know about. As a wife, sister, and best friend of a first responder, it is difficult to explain the respect I have for them. That and the fear I live with daily knowing that my husband may not come home to me.
I’m proud of my husband and everything he does. And it makes me sad knowing that I cannot share that with many people. Those that aren’t in first responder circles don’t realize that our officers are threatened constantly. In most situations, my husband can’t tell people he is a police officer. Only that he works for the city. He has had to drive around our block twice when he comes home from a shift to make sure there is nobody suspicious on our street, targeting him because he is a police officer.
I don’t always feel comfortable talking about calls he goes on or again, about how proud I am of him. The people I’m talking to may have something against the police because of something they saw in the news across the country, or the one dealing they had with a cop was shitty so they’ve pegged all police as corrupt. There is a lot of hate in this world. I don’t even get into conversations people are having when it comes to anti-police topics even though I have a fairly decent opinion on the matter being part of that police community. Why? Because sadly, most people will never change their mind, let alone listen. But when that person needs help, the first responders will show up nonetheless of their support or not. It’s what they do.
So all I ask is that if you do not trust the police, or feel like you have a valid concern or opinion about disliking and/or disrespecting them, please give it another chance. Go to your police department and sign up for a ride-along. Go on calls with them, ask questions. Spend a day or night at their side and see what they see. It may or may not change your perspective, but at least it’ll give you a better idea and, in my opinion, a more valid opinion on the matter. Most people will have only one interaction with a police officer in their life. Sadly, sometimes it is a bad experience or perhaps you caught that officer on a bad day (they very well could have come from a child abuse case, homicide, or haven’t slept in 24 hours). So give it another chance. Be the bigger person if that’s how you want to see it.
And if you are unhappy with the justice system, which let’s be honest….it’s pretty messed up, do not point fingers and direct your hate towards the cops. Go above them to the courts and the people responsible for the laws. My husband has arrested the same person multiple times. And lo and behold he sees the same person again, released by the courts and committing the same crime. The system needs fixing. But it isn’t on the cops level. It’s higher.
Today, New Year’s Eve, a Castle Rock Officer and four Douglas County Deputies were shot, one of whom was killed. On facebook, I saw messages of support, but I also saw hatred. The cop “deserved” it someone said. I couldn’t believe that I read that. That family lost their loved one. They are going to start their year…the rest of their lives, in mourning. And that Blue family not only lost a member but have four others injured. They will never be the same. It’s heartbreaking. My best friend was one of the dispatchers for the shooting. My heart goes out to her.
First responders can’t help but take their work home with them. It’s not only physical but emotional. And you can’t always turn off the emotional. And it’s even harder when there is so much hate directed at you. My husband is a good man. Most of the police he works with are good people as well. But the sins of the few are thrown at them and they must carry the stigma.
To all first responders, thank you. For what you do not only in uniform but what you have to deal with on a day to day basis. I pray you are all protected by the shield of God and that your families stay strong. Let this New Year move in a direction of healing. Hatred will never help anyone or make things progress in the right direction. If you are angry, stop. Take a breath. It’s easy to miss the forest for all the trees.
If you get the chance, thank a first responder. They’re amazing people. And please, do not read this post (especially if you are family) and immediately feel fear or worry for your loved one. It is a tough world for responders right now. But what first responders need in it is our respect and our pride. Not constant worry. They are keeping us safe and getting bad guys off the streets. They are badasses. Be proud and show your support. They signed up for this. Encourage and support them because I promise you this, without healthy support, it’s a lot harder to do what they do. That’s what I’ve learned as a police officer’s wife.
May 2018 bring everyone health, hope, healing, and happiness.
Blessed are the peacemakers;
For they shall be the children of God.
Matthew 5:9
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